random thoughts (the second half that i never posted on polyvore)

-- may 4th, 2018, 12:15 PM

-- song of the day : myself by bazzi -- i think i'm losing my mind, trying to stay inside the lines

-- currently looking forward to : … absolutely nothing tbh. i’m a shell of who i once was. i’m dead inside. school is killing my hopes and dreams.

hey friends! im posting this in art class bc we’re literally doing Nothing right now ahahaha

first off can i just say that this song… is a mood. look up the lyrics. they're v me. and although the “you so f*cking precious” meme song is also on this album (which is called cosmic) i actually unironically really like bazzi’s sound. i once listened to cosmic on repeat while working. it helped quite a bit. 10/10 would recommend

so back when i was sadtrashqueen on polyvore dot com (my 1567th time mentioning polyvore on this blog JESUS CHRIST why can't i ever move on?!) i also had a side account called mindofainsley. this was where i basically just posted random vents and question tags and other things i didn’t think really fit my main account.

… this just made me realize how many accounts i made on that website and now that SOME company had to take all of them away from me i probably lost a Lot more content than i thought i did. not to mention all the tip (basically a form of set where people basically shared advice or knowledge to other members there and stuff) accounts i used to be on and abandoned after they grew inactive….. yikes, man.

but anyway back to the topic!! so i also posted stuff on mindofainsley and i think the very last, most recent set that was on that account had a list of random thoughts i recorded over time and compiled into the set’s description… because that was where people usually wrote things. and that time, i only posted a good half of the thoughts i actually wrote down because posting all of them at once would make it too long, in fact i was planning to make a part two afterwards.

and obviously…… i never got to. because. y’know.

but now that i have this blog, what's stopping me from posting the other half here?

so uh yeah, this introduction has been going on for too long so without further ado here's the second half of the random thoughts list i never got to publish! plus a couple more that i just thought of because… i have a pretty weird mind.

alternate universes:
do you ever wonder is it’s possible that there are different universes out there besides our own.. if that's true, does that mean there can be an alternate universe where i can not-so-coincidentally bump into a famous celebrity at a coffee shop and ”accidentally” spill coffee all over them and have them fall in love with me like in all those cliche self-insert fanfictions? is there one where i never discovered the internet? how about one where humans need to plug themselves in to charge their energy like phones or computers do? or a universe in which the government is ruled by puppies?
tbh that last one in particular seems much better than the universe i live in now :/

dogs with jobs:
going off of my last idea... do dogs have dreams and aspirations? do they think about getting careers like we do? imagine a dog who wants to be a doctor or an artist or even a president. i’d trust a president dog 100% tbh.

that dog would definitely do a better job than our current human president anyway

basically… we are all made of tiny atoms arranged in patterns:
even the bed im laying on top of right now is made of tiny atoms. i could literally fall through my bed if its atoms just so happen to break up and disintegrate. uh. help.

black holes:
earth and everything around it is gonna be sucked into the black hole at the center of the milky way at some point. what a way for all of us to go out honestly. n i c e

but at least i’ll probably die way before that happens??

still scary though.

what does our entire universe actually shaped like?:
like….. the whole thing. idk. is it spherical shaped like earth or more like a cube? how big are we compared to other universes (if they're out there)? i've read something about our universe looking like a huge blobby fractal-looking thing but maybe i'm just imagining it. :/
...... or is our universe actually flat lol #flatearthconfirmed

c r u s t y  boiiii:
(that header is so CURSED i’m so sorry)

so like.. this is a kinda ridiculously silly one but you know how a nickname for the name Christopher is Chris... what if there's an alternate universe where the name Chrustopher was more famous and the name Chrus(t ????) was more popular than Chris ? would Chrustopher be called Crusty instead?? then Crusty would probably be a more popular nickname…., we’d be naming boys (& girls & non-binary folks) Crusty........................... idk i just thought that would be funny.

and this never was funny oh my god WHY past me

is this why polyvore shut down?? so i wouldn't say cringy shit like this to over 9000 people?

digital footprint:

i remember back in middle school where the school counselors had this presentation about online safety and how everything i do online stays there forever for everyone to see. it got me a little worried as an impressionable 13 year old, not gonna lie. like, as a little gen z kid, i basically grew up with the internet. and as an also terrible kid, i was more able to show how terrible i was to so many through joining silly kids forums, and chatting to strangers on club penguin (RIP in pieces), and even posting on facebook for a bit (bc everyone else my age was doing so :/). and not to mention in 2012, when i first joined polyvore. (fun drinking game idea take a shot whenever ainsley mentions polyvore on her blog) i wonder how much of the cringy stuff i posted when i was younger i need to delete now.

and i've heard that job employers search your name online when deciding to hire you. what if they run into the facebook i haven't posted on since i was 10? my very first polyvore? my first tumblr posts? would they all judge me based on that? what if they decide they wouldn't hire me based on what i did as a girl that didn't know the internet wasn't for little kids like her?

i hope i’ll say nothing online that can get me unemployed, lol.

but hey, at least they’ll never find my polyvore….. :/

and finally.... this video:
the. the goddamn guacamole dance lady.

https://youtu.be/MFmr_TZLpS0
i'm soRRY i have TOO MANY memes stuck in my head oh my godDDd
guacamole, guac-guac-amole,,,,,

and… i guess that's my brain. a good mix of existential dread, space, memes, and dogs. if any of the 0 people that look at this blog are reading this, what are you thinking of currently? comment below about a random thought you just had, right now. it's for science.

cheers,

x ainsley